I thought of this blog partly because we just moved to a new city (obviously lol) but also because several of you DM’d me separately about this. I think this is a fair question as when you move it can be hard to find new friends and a new community, especially if you’re working remotely. That being said, here are some things I am doing and have done in the past that have helped me make friends in a new place.
-Don’t be afraid to strike up a conversation with a stranger. Start by giving someone a compliment. This is the easiest way to strike up a conversation with someone you don’t know. From here, if the conversation flows and it’s easy to chat with them then ask for their number. If not, no harm! You gave someone a compliment and I’m sure it made a positive impact on their day.
-Put yourself in situations where you’re likely to meet people. In order to strike up a conversation with people and meet potential friends, you have to put yourself out there. You’re not going to meet anyone by staying at home. For example, I went to a workout class by myself recently and when we were leaving one of the girls from the class complimented my necklaces, we started chatting, and five minutes later I said “Let’s exchange numbers!” Similarly, I went to a park with Fritz and Oz recently and met another woman who brought her dog there – we started chatting and when we were getting ready to leave, I just asked if we could exchange numbers. Likewise, other friends of ours who just moved to a new city, randomly met a couple in West Elm one week and started chatting with them, really liked their vibe, and just said – let’s all get dinner sometime, and they exchanged numbers. I also met one of my now best friends through an event we were both at – so the point is, you just have to get out there. You’re not going to meet anyone sitting at home LOL.
-If you know of one person in the city you’re in, ask if they would want to do a group thing as you’d love to get to know some of their other friends as well. If you already have just one connection in the new city you’re moving to, you both can plan a group workout class, a happy hour, etc. This way you can get to know some of their other friends and see who else you hit it off with.
-Be more strategic about where you live (if possible). One thing about our home in Raleigh was that there wasn’t really anyone our age living in the neighborhood and with all the homes on bigger lots, it was harder to meet your neighbors. In our new house, we’re in a neighborhood that has a good mix of people (age-wise) and it’s much easier to organically meet people out walking, in the yard, etc. because the houses are closer in proximity. For example, we met a lot of our neighbors pretty quickly after moving in and one of them is a couple around Stephen and my age whom we’ve become friends with. So because of the neighborhood and proximity of the homes, it made it much easier to meet people and make friends.
-If your partner has someone they work with that they like, do a double date. Stephen works remotely but a couple of people on his team are in the Denver area. I told him the other day that at some point we should get together with some of them for dinner and have their partner’s come so we can all meet. This is another way to potentially meet other friends/women that you connect with.
-Send the DM. Since I’ve moved, I’ve had several girls reach out to me about getting together for a workout, dinner, etc. and I’ve taken them all up on it! I know it may feel “weird” or “intimidating” to reach out via IG but don’t overthink it. If there is someone you think you’d connect with – ask them to meet for coffee, a walk, a glass of wine, a workout class, etc. The worst that can happen is someone doesn’t respond and/or you hang out and don’t get along as well as you thought and that’s fine too! We’re not all going to be best friends and that’s okay, but you never know if you don’t put yourself out there.
-The app “Meet up”. I personally haven’t used this but I’ve had friends who have used it and have met some of their closest friends with it. There are groups on there for everything – meet-ups for certain dog breeds, intramural sports teams, people who want to meet up at breweries, etc. The list goes on! This is a great way for you to meet other local people.
-Bumble BFF. I cannot personally vouch for this one, but I can’t believe that it’s as exhausting as online dating LOL. The same thing along the lines of sending the DM, giving a stranger a compliment and exchanging numbers – it may not go anywhere or you could meet some really awesome girlfriends! Plus, the intention of the app is to make friends so at least you know the people you meet have the same goal in mind.
I hope that these suggestions help. If you’ve moved to a new city, and have any tips on ways to make friends and meet people, comment below!